Sometimes, I’m not in the best mood. Words that might describe how I feel on those days are low, grumpy, frustrated, and bored. There will always be off days, and that’s fine. I’m probably not the best person to be around on days like these, which is understandable when you think about it. The thing is that days like those are an essential part of the human experience – you don’t want to miss out on them for the sake of being happy.
But what happens when you get a whole string of those off-days, maybe lasting weeks, months, or even years? Too many of us say that we’re in a rut, feel stuck, fed up, or bored, and admit that we don’t want things to be that way, but we don’t know what to do to change. That’s the problem; when you’re in a rut, you don’t have the energy or motivation to improve things, and it’s tough to find the insight or resources you need to make that jump.
Here are five fun and easy ways you can use right now to climb, or better yet, leap, out of the rut and start to get something better for yourself.
1. Do Something Differently
Life tends to run smoothly when we establish systems and routines for things, but the problem comes when things run too smoothly, and we become blinded to any ideas or choices outside our practice. Everything we do daily becomes the norm, running on auto-pilot, and it becomes our whole world.
Start with making one or two simple changes to your day – at breakfast time, your radio station, gym routine, route to work, lunch routine, etc. Don’t worry about the changes or whether they’re right or wrong; make simple choices that will serve you well.
Doing something differently or changing parts of your routine instantly removes you from the norm and allows you to shake off the things that make you feel confined. Step out of your routine, and you’ll be in a position where you’re able to make different choices, see things differently, and get a different.
2. Use your Intuition
Your intuition is a powerful ally, and we all have it, even though you might not recognize it. The dictionary says that intuition is:
- a. The act or faculty of knowing or sensing without rational processes; immediate cognition.
- b. Knowledge gained by the use of this faculty is a perceptive insight.
- A sense of something not evident or deducible; an impression.
One of the best friends you’ll ever have in life is your intuition, and tuning in to it and learning to trust it is something that can have some truly remarkable effects. Accessing your intuition is like working and developing a muscle, but unfortunately, it can be harder to locate than a bicep or quadricep, which tend to stay in the same place. Here are some quick tips for accessing and trusting it –
- Practice maintaining an open-minded, playful, experimental, non-judgmental attitude. This is the most fertile ground to tap into your intuition.
- Practice making wild guesses in your everyday life. Guess what a salesperson’s name is, what a new person or place will look like, or who’s calling on the phone. Don’t worry about getting it wrong; you’re just working that muscle.
- Try a few simple observation exercises in your daily life. Whether you’re in a restaurant, on a train, in a bar, or out shopping, practice noticing non-verbal behavior in others. Look for shifts in posture, eye movements, vocal tone or tempo, etc. Guess how they’re feeling or what they’re talking about.
3. Nourishment
Imagine you’re walking home from the supermarket with a couple of bags of groceries, but those bags have holes in them. You’re walking along merrily, leaving a trail of your things behind you, but when you get home, you unpack what’s left and ask, “Didn’t I have more than this?”
Nourishment is about plugging those holes in your life and ensuring you have things that keep you feeling nourished – nourished in your head, heart, and stomach. Remember that you can’t give away what you don’t have and can’t spend the energy you’ve already spent.
It doesn’t have to be the big things in life that nourish you, and it’s often the simplest little thing that strikes a chord, makes you feel like yourself again, or makes you smile from ear to ear – calling a friend, talking a walk in the park, or listening to your favorite song, for example. So, what keeps you balanced? What relaxes you or makes you feel peaceful? What makes you feel like you again?
You’re important enough to take care of yourself, and it doesn’t matter what it is; take the time to do it. If necessary, go as far as booking time in your diary. You’re the only one of you, so it’s your responsibility to ensure you’re okay.
4. Perfect Day
Here’s something to play with – your Perfect Day. A few years ago, this idea came to me when a good friend suddenly asked me, “What would be your perfect day?” I’d never been asked that before, and I found myself spontaneously making up storytelling her about my Perfect Day from when my eyes flickered open to when my head hit the pillow.
I went through each part of the day telling her what I was doing, who I was with, where we were, how it felt, and what happened next. Bit by bit and without even thinking about it, I’d put together a rich, colorful, exciting, and enjoyable day, which still holds as my Perfect Day. The best part is that you can start introducing little bits of your Perfect Day into your real life or work to make some of it happen.
For example, in part of my Perfect Day, I visit a company where I’m helping the directors and employees focus on their strengths and create an environment where people love to work and can be their best. Even before I knew there was such a thing as coaching or that I could be a coach. My Perfect Day has become like a good friend I can call on whenever I want.
So what’s your Perfect Day? Write down words, ideas, themes, or a whole narrative – even draw pictures if you want to. Don’t overthink it; don’t worry about sounding silly or too grand. Just shoot from the hip and see what comes out naturally for you. Have fun, play with it – it’s your Perfect Day.
5. Get Some Fun, Fulfillment, and Freedom
The Three F’s – Fun, Fulfilment, and Freedom – encompass many of what people seek in life and contain the solutions to having, doing, and being those things. Here are some definitions,
Fun, n. – A source of enjoyment or pleasure; playful activity.
Full-filament, n. – To bring into actuality, to complete, a feeling of satisfaction at having achieved your desires.
Free-dom, n. – The capacity to exercise choice, free will, frankness, or boldness; the absence of constraint in choice or action.
Reread those. Those things are enormous, profound, broad, and much more straightforward than we make them.
Where are you with each of the Three F’s? How much of each do you have right now? How much of each do you want? Whatever gap there is, recognize that it can be closed and that you can close it. What would things be like if you were to close that gap? What would happen if you climbed a point or two on the Fun scale? What if you could add an end to your level of fulfillment or Freedom? How would that feel? Pretty good, right? So, what one thing can you do right now to help you get more?